My RV is backed up into my friend Lula’s back yard here in Asheville. I am situated about a foot from a stand of bamboo and other trees and shrubs. Yesterday that put me about two feet away from a Hooded Warbler. Now, that might not mean much to you if you’re not a birdwatcher, but for me it was an exquisite moment of joy and connectedness.
I became a birder (actually I’m just a dabbler, not the serious birdwatcher that some folks are) somewhat by accident. When I bought my little house in north Asheville in 2003 I was gratified to find that I lived near Beaver Lake, and that the trail around the lake and through the bird sanctuary was the perfect distance for my daily 30-minute walk. One morning as I ended my walk in the parking lot of the bird sanctuary I stopped at the notice board and saw that the Elisha Mitchell Chapter of the Audubon Society hosts a guided bird walk on the first Saturday of every month. Well, since I was going to be walking at that time anyway, I decided to check it out.
I quickly realized on my first Saturday bird walk that my cheap binoculars were not adequate so I asked one of the birders (there were about 20 that day) about hers and she told me that particular pair cost about $300 (or was it $600?). Gulp. But she said I should go to KMart and get a pair for about $30 that would probably suffice. I did, and I’ve been looking at birds ever since, sometimes with a group, sometimes by myself.
I learned from birdwatchers that there are lots of different species of warblers that come through Asheville in spring and fall on their way to somewhere else. Some birders are what could be called “warbler snobs.” They will go anywhere, any time to see any species of warbler. To them all other birds pale in comparison. For me, even with my new and improved $30 binoculars, I had a hard time finding the often elusive warblers that others saw and pointed out to me. (”Look up there about 1:00 on the branch of that willow, just to the right of that dead oak. See it? It’s right there.” The good thing about birders is that they are infinitely patient with newbies: they want everyone to get the kick they get.)
So you can imagine my excitement when, upon hearing something land in the shrub next to the window of my RV, I looked out to see a beautiful yellow-breasted bird with a yellow and black head. I knew immediately that it was a warbler of some kind and I felt blessed indeed to be with it “up close and personal.” I could have reached out and touched it, and the reason it was not afraid to be so close to a human is that it couldn’t see me through the dark glass of my RV window. It looked around, hopped from one branch to another and back, while I held my breath. The entire encounter lasted about five seconds, and when it flew away I went immediately to my field guide to find that it was indeed a Hooded Warbler, common to the entire eastern half of the US, and probably on every Asheville birder’s list of birds they have spotted. Now I can say I “got” a Hooded Warbler.
I’ve had similar experiences many times since I’ve being living in my motorhome. While staying in the driveway of a friend in Chapel Hill, I awakened several mornings to find myself in the midst of a herd of deer. My present situation has afforded communion with several species of birds, and with three different neighborhood cats, none of which knew I was here. It’s as if I were just another creature on the planet, no different from any other, which is, of course, absolutely true. We humans usually can’t experience it because many of our fellow creatures are afraid of us.
It’s a lesson in stillness, really. Even if I were not hidden behind tinted glass, if I were to sit in the same spot long enough, and be totally still, I’m sure the same types of encounters would occur. When was the last time you sat still that long? Eckhart says awakening (his term for enlightenment) happens in the stillness. I’m cheating, here behind my dark glass. Maybe I’ll sit outside without my precious laptop and see what happens.
Mother of the Bride
October 2nd, 2008
Somehow I thought I would never have to be one of those women. My only daughter married her first husband before a judge. That didn’t work out and now she wants to marry her second with some ceremony. I don’t have a problem with that at all, but yesterday it came home to me in a big way that I am going to be attending the ceremony as the Mother of the Bride and I don’t have a costume!
I have given away and/or sold all my appropriate MOB clothes and shoes so that I could fit myself and my stuff into a Roadtrek 190 Popular, which doesn’t really matter because I didn’t have the right dress and shoes anyway. So yesterday I went shopping (ugh).
I started at two used/vintage stores in downtown Asheville and found nothing. Why is it that no size 16-18 dresses ever make it to these shops? So then it was off to Ross [Dress for Less]. I needed something so inexpensive that I wouldn’t mind paying for a dress I would wear only once. Fortunately, the selection was great! The only problem was deciding which style would please the bride: dressy/sparkly or tailored. I bought five outfits totalling $180 and took them to my daughter’s for approval
She liked all of them, which was gratifying to say the least, but not particularly helpful. We narrowed it down to the brown or the teal, both of them three-piece chiffon-ish numbers with glitter. Brown? I haven’t worn brown since 1973 but my daughter tells me it’s the “in” color; and besides, the glitter is gold/orange so it goes with the fall theme of the wedding.
Only problem, excuse me: challenge (thank you, Eckhart) now is the mother of the groom hasn’t bought her dress yet so I can’t make a definite decision until she does (something about her being concerned with having very few choices: I don’t know), and then I have to find some cheap shoes to go with the dress. Don’t you wish your life were this jam-packed and fun-filled?
Want to know what I’m looking forward to the most in connection with this wedding, besides seeing my Memphis siblings? Being in my daughter’s clean apartment. No one has seen her living room floor or kitchen counters in months. Exciting stuff.
Finding Peace in Nature
September 29th, 2008
Yesterday my friend Lula and I hiked up Roan Mountain to Jane Bald.
When we reached our destination the elevation was about 6,000 feet. Unfortunately, we were in the middle of a cloud and couldn’t see anything of the surrounding view. But for me it didn’t matter one little bit. It was just so wonderful to be up there, wind and fog and all (and of course, I felt rather pleased with myself for making the hike as it was quite treacherous in places–and it was my first time on the Appalachian Trail!). I don’t know what the temperature was but I would guess it was about 50 degrees. With the wind it felt very chilly indeed.Being one with the cloud and the mountain, the plants and the rocks, would not have meant so much to me if not for the work I have been doing with Eckhart Tolle, Elizabeth Lesser, Wayne Dyer and others recently, all through the wonder of the internet and the gift of Oprah Winfrey. Many spiritual teachers recommend getting in touch with the source of all being by going into the natural world. As Tolle says, you can connect with your consciousness by meditating on the microwave (I’m paraphrasing here) but it’s easier to get the message if you focus on a flower. The photo didn’t come out as well as I had hoped but if you look closely at the little red dots in the center, those are flowers growing out of a bed of moss and lichens (I think) clinging to a rock at 5,000 feet along the Appalachian Trail near Roan Mountain, NC, and I was there to witness them. I was so happy to be in the cathedral on the mountain rather than in the pew in town.
Eckhart Again
September 26th, 2008
I can’t seem to get enough of Eckhart Tolle. What an incredible teacher. If you have not read A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose run, don’t walk, to your nearest bookseller and get this book. When you have read it, go to Oprah.com and sign on to the ten sessions she did with Eckhart Tolle. With any luck, just reading the book will put you on a path that will change your life. Seeing Tolle with Oprah, and hearing questions others have, really brings it all home. This is how we can change the world. McCain can’t do it and Obama can’t do it, but you and I can, because we can contribute to the universal consciousness that will make it happen. Want inner peace? You have it already and Eckhart can help you discover the place in you where it resides.
Too “woo-woo” for you? Well, words always have been, and always will be, inadequate to describe the indescribable. I might have felt the same way not long ago, but when you are a seeker after truth or enlightenment or whatever you call it, and someone comes along who really can help you to see that you already have it, you pay attention, right?
This man is worth your attention. The world needs to wake up, and it happens one person at a time. Join us.
Stuck!
September 24th, 2008
There’s no gas in downtown Asheville! That is, if the one station I heard about on the news is now completely out. They made the news because three guys got in a fight and the police had to be called in! Sometimes life gets just a little too weird. I’m staying in a friend’s back yard and I have about 1/4 tank of gas so I guess I’ll just hang out for a few days. I can download old black and white movies from Netflix and work on my blog. Unfortunately, working on my blog is a big headache, literally, since I don’t know what the heck I’m doing.
See, what I really need to be doing, aside from keeping you informed of my whereabouts (it’s so boring I don’t know why you care) is finishing my pet portraits page so I can get it out there for people who might like to have a hand-drawn portrait of their special friend. My new business is called All In The Family: Pet Portraits by Lila, and you can see a sample of my work on my pets page. I’d tell you how to get to that page if I knew how. So many questions, so little brainpower. This is one of those times when I wish I were 30 again, or maybe 15 would be more useful, since it seems that the younger you are when you try to learn this stuff the better (maybe 5 would be even better).
How are you coping with the gas shortage? That is, if you’re in Western North Carolina. I guess folks outside our area are not experiencing this problem. Do you think there really is a shortage? Some don’t. Who knows? I’m just happy to be retired. I can be stuck for a while and it won’t matter. Good luck if you’re still having to make the commute every day.
Look at Me, I'm Blogging!
September 17th, 2008
To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.
Dame Freya Stark, British Explorer, b.1883-d.1993
I told everyone I would keep in touch by weblog and I truly have wanted to keep my promise, but every time I sit down to write, my editor (we’ll call her Linda, after someone I used to know who now is trying to get beyond perfectionism and learn to let herself just BE) would tell me it was boring, or it was going to be boring (since I hadn’t even started), and so I would decide it was the wrong time of day, or the wrong place, or…well, you know.
Today all that ends. I beg your indulgence while I give it one more try. I hope you’ll be kind.
As you may know, I’m currently living in a 19-foot camper van, a Roadtrek 190 Popular to be specific, parked this week at Small Country Campground in Byrd Mill, Louisa County, Virginia, off I-64 between Charlottesville and Richmond. My handy-dandy indoor/outdoor thermometer says it’s 78 degrees inside and 75 degrees outside, but since I am pretty sure neither of those is accurate, let’s just say there is a slight drizzle falling and it’s not hot (hallelujah). I have a roof exhaust fan that is pulling a cool breeze in through the window behind me, so I am comfy cozy.
I’ve spent two months in my little shell, whom I’ve re-christened Sheila (Shell: Sheila—get it? Lila and Sheila—oh never mind), but I’ve hardly left NC, the first month having been spent in Asheville just getting the feel of things in the RV and learning to use all the new electronics I bought, all of which were totally new for me, and each of which came with its own two-pound manual, sometimes more than one and usually written in more than two languages.
(Linda: Well that’s not very interesting. Tell them something interesting.)
Shut up! Oops, sorry, not you. So anyway, here’s the thing: I want this big adventure to be something more than just a trip around the country in a camper. At first that was all I wanted and/or needed. My friends said, “Ooh, I want to come,” or “Gee, you’re brave to do that all by yourself,” and my chest would swell with pride and I’d feel really good about myself. But now that I’m out here, I want the trip to be more meaningful in some way; I just haven’t figured that part out yet.
Occasionally I think perhaps there is some “quest” that I could embark on, like finding the best vegan food in every state. You know, like they do with barbecue or whatever. I would be the secret vegan food critic, selling articles from the road to Vegan Magazine. Then I’d collect my oh-so-clever reviews into a book and become a famous food critic. And then I’d have my own show on the Food Network, and I wouldn’t let the fact that I know nothing about vegan cooking deter me, I’d learn as I go.
Or…I’d become a troubador, or is it a minstrel? Whatever. I would drive into the small town square in places where folks don’t have a lot of cultural events and set up my little show. I’d sing and tell stories and juggle, and kids would come by the dozens and bring their parents and grandparents, and they’d throw money and we’d all have a really good time. And I wouldn’t let the fact that I don’t play an instrument and I can’t remember the stories deter me, I’d learn to play the ukulele and make up the stories as I go along.
Or maybe I would just collect rocks…if I had a place to put them.
Well, that’s what I think about sometimes. Other times, I just want to go deeper into myself, in my solitude, in my little home on wheels, where I don’t have to perform in any way for anyone. Where life is simple and I don’t have to learn new tricks or remember any lines. Where the most taxing part of the day is remembering to unplug the RV before leaving the campground (I now have a list). I even bought Eckhart Tolle’s book A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose on CD so I could listen to it while I drive. I loved the book so I thought this would be a great way to have a constant reminder to be in the present. I’ve been on the road for two months and haven’t opened the package. What’s that about?
No, there’s something more I want to do. I just can’t put my finger on what it is. I discovered recently that my life must include service to others or I’m not fulfilled, but I can’t volunteer my time in the usual way when I’m in a new place every week (although I figure I can at least continue to give blood every eight weeks).
My need to serve, or be useful in some way, has been on my mind even more since I read Life Is a Verb: 37 days to wake up, be mindful, and live intentionally, by my friend Patti Digh of Asheville. It’s a very personal, reflective book but with such exquisite nuggets of truth for living that I know you will be as inspired as I have been. The premise: How would you spend your time if you knew you only had 37 days to live? The question is based on Patti’s true life experience following the death of her stepfather from lung cancer. I love the exercises at the end of each chapter: suggestions for things to do in order to live more intentionally, life being about action (definition of a verb, right?). Get your own book and have Patti sign it at Malaprop’s on September 20 (or maybe coming she’ll be in your town—see 37days.typepad.com for schedule).
So perhaps someone out there has some suggestions for how I can live intentionally, and in service, while I’m out here having the absolute time of my life! (Hey…who says simply having the time of my life isn’t allowed? Because it’s a totally selfish act? Hmm… Maybe it’s that first-born thing again…taking responsibility… Oh shut up, Linda)
My Itinerary
September 17th, 2008
July 12 – August 12: Wilson’s RV & Campground, Amboy Road, Asheville
August 12: Julian Price State Park Campground
August 13: Visited Blowing Rock, then Boone (looking for a car charger for my cell phone), spent the night at WalMart for the first time, in Winston-Salem (not too bad)
August 14: Toured Old Salem which I enjoyed because I like histo
rical sites.
August 15: After spending the night at WalMart in Asheboro, I went to the Africa part of the North Carolina Zoo (the other part is North America). Since I’m not really fond of zoos, it was pretty much a waste of time: I was not impressed. Spent the night in the driveway of a B&B in Siler City (no charge; nice people; we went out to eat).
August 16: Went to Hillsborough to spend time with friends of a friend from Asheville who were full-timers in an RV for 3 years. Had a great week seeing the sights in Raleigh (Dead Sea Scrolls exhibit was great, as was the NC Farmers Market)
, Durham (Duke Gardens and Nasher Museum show of El Greco/Velasquez-era paintings) and Hillsborough. Also had my first experience contra dancing. Wow, what a workout!
August 23: Spent 3 days in Chapel Hill in the driveway of contacts through UU church. Spent an afternoon on Franklin St., main drag at UNC, saw a movie.
August 27: Spent time in Roseboro with my ex-husband’s cousin and his wife on the pecan farm they call The Nut House.
Sept. 2: Back to Hillsborough in another contact’s driveway one night
Sept. 3: Drove to Danville, VA, just so I could say I had left NC! Spent the night at WalMart, stayed all day
Sept. 4: Drove to Lynchburg where I spent the night at, you guessed it: WalMart.
Sept. 5: On the way to Charlottesville I saw the turnoff to Natural Bridge so I took it and had a good time touring the caverns, the natural stone bridge (wow) and the wax museum. Decided to head to Charlottesville on Blue Ridge Parkway (big mistake: it gets pretty monotonous after a while, and it’s very slow going) but got off at Sheronda Lake and found a campground.
Sept. 6: In the morning I was all set to leave when a ranger told me about the Museum of Frontier Culture in Staunton, so I went and it was very interesting. They have disassembled several really old buildings in Europe and brought them over here, where folks in period costume answer questions about what you see in the houses. The oldest was built in 1630! Then on to Charlottesville, finally, and past
it about 30 miles to Small Country Campground in Louisa. The next day I visited Monticello, Thomas Jefferson's plantation, which was akin to a religious experience.
Sept. 13: Back in Asheville, after an overnight stay at WalMart in Roanoke, to help my daughter prepare for her Oct. 25 wedding.
I’ve spent two months in my little shell, whom I’ve re-christened Sheila (Shell: Sheila—get it? Lila and Sheila—oh never mind), but I’ve hardly left NC, the first month having been spent in Asheville just getting the feel of things in the RV and learning to use all the new electronics I bought, all of which were totally new for me, and each of which came with its own two-pound manual, sometimes more than one and usually written in more than two languages.
(Linda: Well that’s not very interesting. Tell them something interesting.)
Shut up! Oops, sorry, not you. So anyway, here’s the thing: I want this big adventure to be something more than just a trip around the country in a camper. At first that was all I wanted and/or needed. My friends said, “Ooh, I want to come,” or “Gee, you’re brave to do that all by yourself,” and my chest would swell with pride and I’d feel really good about myself. But now that I’m out here, I want the trip to be more meaningful in some way; I just haven’t figured that part out yet.
Occasionally I think perhaps there is some “quest” that I could embark on, like finding the best vegan food in every state. You know, like they do with barbecue or whatever. I would be the secret vegan food critic, selling articles from the road to Vegan Magazine. Then I’d collect my oh-so-clever reviews into a book and become a famous food critic. And then I’d have my own show on the Food Network, and I wouldn’t let the fact that I know nothing about vegan cooking deter me, I’d learn as I go.
Or…I’d become a troubador, or is it a minstrel? Whatever. I would drive into the small town square in places where folks don’t have a lot of cultural events and set up my little show. I’d sing and tell stories and juggle, and kids would come by the dozens and bring their parents and grandparents, and they’d throw money and we’d all have a really good time. And I wouldn’t let the fact that I don’t play an instrument and I can’t remember the stories deter me, I’d learn to play the ukulele and make up the stories as I go along.
Or maybe I would just collect rocks…if I had a place to put them.
Well, that’s what I think about sometimes. Other times, I just want to go deeper into myself, in my solitude, in my little home on wheels, where I don’t have to perform in any way for anyone. Where life is simple and I don’t have to learn new tricks or remember any lines. Where the most taxing part of the day is remembering to unplug the RV before leaving the campground (I now have a list). I even bought Eckhart Tolle’s book A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose on CD so I could listen to it while I drive. I loved the book so I thought this would be a great way to have a constant reminder to be in the present. I’ve been on the road for two months and haven’t opened the package. What’s that about?
No, there’s something more I want to do. I just can’t put my finger on what it is. I discovered recently that my life must include service to others or I’m not fulfilled, but I can’t volunteer my time in the usual way when I’m in a new place every week (although I figure I can at least continue to give blood every eight weeks).
My need to serve, or be useful in some way, has been on my mind even more since I read Life Is a Verb: 37 days to wake up, be mindful, and live intentionally, by my friend Patti Digh of Asheville. It’s a very personal, reflective book but with such exquisite nuggets of truth for living that I know you will be as inspired as I have been. The premise: How would you spend your time if you knew you only had 37 days to live? The question is based on Patti’s true life experience following the death of her stepfather from lung cancer. I love the exercises at the end of each chapter: suggestions for things to do in order to live more intentionally, life being about action (definition of a verb, right?). Get your own book and have Patti sign it at Malaprop’s on September 20 (or maybe coming she’ll be in your town—see 37days.typepad.com for schedule).
So perhaps someone out there has some suggestions for how I can live intentionally, and in service, while I’m out here having the absolute time of my life! (Hey…who says simply having the time of my life isn’t allowed? Because it’s a totally selfish act? Hmm… Maybe it’s that first-born thing again…taking responsibility… Oh shut up, Linda)
My Itinerary
September 17th, 2008
July 12 – August 12: Wilson’s RV & Campground, Amboy Road, Asheville
August 12: Julian Price State Park Campground
August 13: Visited Blowing Rock, then Boone (looking for a car charger for my cell phone), spent the night at WalMart for the first time, in Winston-Salem (not too bad)
August 14: Toured Old Salem which I enjoyed because I like histo
rical sites.August 15: After spending the night at WalMart in Asheboro, I went to the Africa part of the North Carolina Zoo (the other part is North America). Since I’m not really fond of zoos, it was pretty much a waste of time: I was not impressed. Spent the night in the driveway of a B&B in Siler City (no charge; nice people; we went out to eat).
August 16: Went to Hillsborough to spend time with friends of a friend from Asheville who were full-timers in an RV for 3 years. Had a great week seeing the sights in Raleigh (Dead Sea Scrolls exhibit was great, as was the NC Farmers Market)
, Durham (Duke Gardens and Nasher Museum show of El Greco/Velasquez-era paintings) and Hillsborough. Also had my first experience contra dancing. Wow, what a workout!August 23: Spent 3 days in Chapel Hill in the driveway of contacts through UU church. Spent an afternoon on Franklin St., main drag at UNC, saw a movie.
August 27: Spent time in Roseboro with my ex-husband’s cousin and his wife on the pecan farm they call The Nut House.
Sept. 2: Back to Hillsborough in another contact’s driveway one night
Sept. 3: Drove to Danville, VA, just so I could say I had left NC! Spent the night at WalMart, stayed all day
Sept. 4: Drove to Lynchburg where I spent the night at, you guessed it: WalMart.
Sept. 5: On the way to Charlottesville I saw the turnoff to Natural Bridge so I took it and had a good time touring the caverns, the natural stone bridge (wow) and the wax museum. Decided to head to Charlottesville on Blue Ridge Parkway (big mistake: it gets pretty monotonous after a while, and it’s very slow going) but got off at Sheronda Lake and found a campground.
Sept. 6: In the morning I was all set to leave when a ranger told me about the Museum of Frontier Culture in Staunton, so I went and it was very interesting. They have disassembled several really old buildings in Europe and brought them over here, where folks in period costume answer questions about what you see in the houses. The oldest was built in 1630! Then on to Charlottesville, finally, and past
it about 30 miles to Small Country Campground in Louisa. The next day I visited Monticello, Thomas Jefferson's plantation, which was akin to a religious experience.Sept. 13: Back in Asheville, after an overnight stay at WalMart in Roanoke, to help my daughter prepare for her Oct. 25 wedding.
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