Maybe I really should write that book. There I've said it "out loud." I keep thinking about writing a book about my life, for my descendants, not for publication, but it seems so much like drudgery that I don't even want to start. Drudgery: a good enough reason not to do it. Perhaps if I characterize the process in a slightly less pejorative manner I'll be more inspired to begin. All I know is that I would have been thrilled to have such a history of my own mother's life, or my grandmother's.
Meanwhile, I went to MacKerricher State Park yesterday, where I saw my first wild seals. Unfortunately, they were "sunning" (there was no sun) too far away for a good photo but I got a good look through the binoculars. If you click on this picture you will get an enlarged shot of the white, sausage-looking things stretched out on the rocks.
I also saw lots of ground squirrels, a species native to northern California with a dark patch on their backs that other species don't have. According to a website article they are terrible pests and I can see why. There were lots of them, all eating, and begging (obviously 
some people had not heeded the signs about feeding them).
I drove to Mendocino a couple days ago but it was too foggy for photos so I will try again, perhaps today as the sun is out here right now. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean it will be shining 10 miles up the road. There is a lighthouse to visit between here and there so it won't be a wasted trip.
We're having company for dinner tonight and will attend a play afterward. A reason to take a shower and do something with my hair, which has grown past my shoulders. Gonna have that ol' lady bun goin' on pretty soon. I used to see my mother's face in the mirror, now I see my grandmother's. Oh well. I feel good physically and psychologically and that's all that matters.
5 comments:
First, let me say what I noticed first off ... and that is that I have NEVER had occasion to use the word pejorative! I've always said derogatory, but now I think I'll start using pejorative. Thanks!
Secondly, I don't know how you could feel useless while doing something that most people would love doing, namely traveling and meeting new people and doing new things. But I guess the old statement the grass is always greener was coined for a reason! And aren't you doing some speaking here and there? Are you doing any of your animal drawings?
And thirdly, I think writing a book about your life and descendents sounds like a grand idea! What did you mean about a history like of your mother's and grandmother's life? Did they do something 'special'?
How did your birthday meeting with that 'connection' go?
Hmmmn.
Okay, which grandmother - Bessie or Cora? They both had the bun.
Being productive is a puritan concept that is nothing more than a yoke around one's shoulders. An artist is always productive evaluating and ordering all that she perceives. A writer is also a producer who constantly ingests and eventually bursts out with a work. Your mind and soul are working. Perhaps your body needs stillness and the mundane for that to happen. Your life right now is a gift, a marvel of the possibilities of new things happening every day. Seize it and be happy in the now. If you need to write the book, you will know it. You will do it when it is right. Be at peace.
Anonymous on 8-22: Thanks. I've thought of myself as lazy on too many occasions. Today I will practice yet again to let all that go. Here's an "aha:" Complaining about oneself is still complaining.
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